weekend plans shaping up nicely

Last night I planted some of my annuals, finally. I love the smell of Petunias. Yum!

Tomorrow looks like it will have the best weather this weekend, so we're planning on testing out Lou's new para-sail. After work I think we're heading down to the lake to test it out. Hopefully it won't be too cold.

foot-in-mouth disease

Why is it that as soon as I think I can't possibly stand my mother-in-law, and after I've said some very not-nice things about, she goes and does something absolutely amazing for me?!?!

Friday
Sue and Courtney arrived about dinner time. I expected my mother and sister to arrive shortly thereafter, however, my father called to tell me my Mom had forgotten her luggage. So Courtney and I went to Pennsylvania Friday night. My Dad met us at a rest stop at the Ohio/Pennsylvania border where I picked up the forgotten luggage. Courtney and I got home about 11-11:30 that night. But I do have to say that while it was a major pain in the ass, we had a good time catching up, hearing about the last 5 years of each other's lives.

Saturday
...the day of my lovely bridal shower. It was so nice - I was so touched at how many people from Kevin's side of the family attended. Kev's Mom threw a lovely party, complete with yummy food, decorate-the-bride-to-be-with-toilet-paper-games, and lots of presents. All for me. Kevin's Mom was astounding - she gave me a Queen Sized quilt which she made herself. Aside from the fact that she still thinks purple is my favorite color, the quilt is sort of a tribute to my three kitties, complete with fishbowls and patches that look almost identical to my babies. I cried the instant I saw it, then she cried, and we embraced, and it was such a nice moment between us. I couldn't believe it. And now I feel like an ass because of some of the really not-so-nice things I've said about her.

Sunday
My Mom, my sister Gretchen, and I finished the butterfly party favors today and relaxed in front of the TV. We watched Adaptaion, About a Boy, and Life or Something Like It. Since Kevin, my brother Scott, and Lou were in Canada, we waited up for them to get home. When they finally came in around midnight, it was like a mini-family reunion. *Smiles*

Monday
How nice it was to sleep in for once! We had a leisurely brunch at Noon. I made a feast of French ("Freedom"?) Toast and eggs, while Gretchen made hash browns from scratch. While Kevin, Scott, and Gretchen went to Sears to use the gift card my Mom gave us as a shower present for Kevin, Mom and I went out and got my annuals. I didn't get any plants in the ground though, because it started raining right when we got home. The rest of the evening was spent relaxing with my husband before he had to go to work.

What a nice weekend. *Sighs*

maybe i'll grow up to be wise, as good as he

I smile every morning on my way to work, as I'm driving down the side streets in order to avoid the morning rush on York Road. I smile because every morning at 8:30, just as I pass the school and make the turn onto Kader, there's always an old man out taking his morning walk. I smile because he wears a beret with sweat pants, and his down vest is the brightest shade of aqua I've ever seen. Mostly though, I smile because every morning as I drive past him at 8:30, he waves to me. I've never met him; he doesn't know who I am. Yet, every morning there he is, waving at me. And I wave back.

My weekend in New York

Perhaps Wedneday is a bit late to be talking about the weekend, but wow I haven't had time for anything since I came back Monday night!

Friday
I left Cleveland about 2pm. The car trip was uneventful, except for some rain right over the P.A./N.Y. border. Got into town about 7, after stopping a few times for a potty break. I have the world's smallest bladder. Luckily Mom and Dad had dinner waiting for me. I really wanted to go out and see some friends I hadn't seen in a long time, but once dinner was over and my mother and I started talking, the next 5 hours flew by and at midnight I went to bed. After several glasses of Bourbon.

Saturday
I awoke with a slight headache at 6:45am, got in the shower, and by 7:30, Dad and I were on the way to Potsdam. Mom had already left to pick up her Godmother Barb, who is like my surrogate grandmother. After stopping for coffee and breakfast somewhere between Fulton and Antwerp, I felt much better. We met up with Mom and Barb at a gas station, got out the walkie-talkies, and continued up to Potsdam taking turns spotting for cops. Heh heh. Sometimes my Dad's love of gadgets really comes in handy.

We got into town about 2-ish. Checked into the hotel in which my parents were staying, in Potsdam, and Mom, Barb, and I took a much needed nap. at 3:30, Mom, Barb, and I left to go to Massena (20 minutes away) to check into the hotel where Barba, my aunt, and I were staying. Then we went to the Massena Airport to pick up my aunt at 5pm, who had flown in from Columbus. I've never seen such a tiny airport. One room! And the plane on which my aunt flew in was a teeny prop plane. I'm glad I didn't fly.

Dinner was at Maxfield's in downtown Potsdam, where Scott, Gretchen, and Gretchen's boyfriend Dan met up with us. A very nice dinner we had. The was the first time we had all been together, except Kevin, since Christmas. Later that night we headed back to the hotel so Gretchen could open her graduation gifts. Barb, my aunt, and I drove to Massena at about 11, and Probably everyone was in bed by 12.

Sunday
I was up at 6:30 again, and looking out the window, the weather seemed doubtful. So I showered and hoped for sun, since Potsdam graduation was to be held outside. We got to graduation about 9:30 and the sun was shining, and it was warm! So warm, in fact, that all of us got a massive sunburn. First, though, before anything else, I have got to complain about how disorganized this graduation ceremony was. None of the names were called in alphabetical order, so no one knew when his or her child would be walking. Therefore, everyone felt the need to leave his or her seat, crowd around in front of the stage, and completely block the view of the polite people who remained seated. Idiots! It was mass pandemonium up there. Of course, when Gretchen's name was called, we couldn't see her walk across the stage or shake hands with the Dean. I was able to see her exit off the stage to my left, but that was it. So I made sure I screamed as loud and obnoxiously as possible: "Yeah, Gretchen!!!!" I got a lot of stares, but I didn't care.

After the ceremony, we did the whole picture-taking thing, followed by 3 hours worth of helping Gretchen pack up her dorm room, where Scott and I did most of the work. Finally, at about 4 we were back on the road to come back to Rochester. I was exhausted when we got back, and after unloading the cars (mine and Scott's), I was able to spend some time with my little brother, which I thought was much needed. So we went out for a ride in his new Thunderbird, and then played Euchre with Dan, and some other friends of his. It was a nice time.

Now it's back to the routine. The first day back after vacation is always hardest, and it didn't make things better that all my co-workers called me "Lobster" all day yesterday. Not to mention I feel like I'm a day behind. I only have 2 days now to get my house ready for my visitors this weekend!

The Long Road Home

This afternoon I'm heading home to Rochester for the second time this month (3rd time this year!). This time I'm going alone, as Kevin has little vacation time left. I always start to feel anxious about these trips when I make them alone. There's a kind of duality about them...like I'm 2 people separated by the long stretch of I-90 between Rochester and Cleveland. When I make the trip, in a lot of ways I feel like I'm going back to my former self. I have done so much growing and changing since I left Rochester that going home really feels like I'm just temporarily visiting some foreign place. Yet, when I get there, the place will seem familiar. I, however, will feel awkward. I don't know my way around anymore. I don't have a room at my parents' house anymore. My old neighbors don't recognize me at all, and I have a fear of running into old high school acquaintances who never left.

These visits always make me nostalgic. I'm sure I'll spend a lot of time day dreaming and writing in my journal. Maybe I'll even get to see a couple of the people there about whom I still care. There are a few. The good thing is that my time in Rochester itself will be brief. Saturday morning we head to SUNY Potsdam to meet up with my sister who graduates on Sunday. Then it's back to Rochester again Sunday afternoon after the graduation ceremony. Then it's back to Cleveland on Monday.

At least I'll have the long car trips to help prepare myself and make peace with my anxiety. It's really not that bad. Just different.

invite a Guest up until you announced that you had moved in

I re-ordered my invitations yesterday, which cost me an arm and a leg. I've spent every morning at work this week so far addressing my envelopes before my boss comes in and sees me slacking off. If you read this blog and you are sent an invitation, here's a head's up: I know the RSVP says by June 1st. I don't care if you can't RSVP by June 1st. The invitations are going out late because of all these last minute changes, so I'm ok with not having an RSVP by the 1st. No worries.

Your alter poet is Thomas Stearns Eliot. For you,
life rocks pretty hard!


Who is Your Alter Poet?
brought to you by Quizilla

I saw this quiz on Julia's Blog today, and I just had to take it myself. I find the results particularly interesting and ironic, since I am addicted to T.S. Eliot. So much so that in high school, I did my senior year AP English research project on him. Then, in college, I wrote a song cycle to some of his Wasteland text. Hmmmm....

to advance or not to advance, I hear you calling

The wedding planning is back in full swing again. This weekend Kevin and I went down to his parents' house to pick up all of our picnic stuff, our 15 bottles of booze, and the pop we've been purchasing on and off for the last six months. I got a weird vibe from his parents while we were there. I know they are not happy about what happened, yet they pretended everything was fine. Oh well. Now we can proceed with a relatively finalized plan. I feel badly that this had to happen, but I feel like we did our best to compromise. At least Kevin's Mom didn't cancel my bridal shower to spite me. I was worried about that.

This weekend it's off to New York again....

just released

I am so excited for the next Tori Amos Show in Cleveland, on August 16th at the Tower City Amphitheater. I can't wait! Probably since I am way too cheap to pay $42 for a ticket (even for Tori), I will try and convince Lou to take me down to the flats on the boat so I can hear the show from the river, and not pay anything. I quite possibly might even be willing to perform sexual favors for this. That is, if I can convince him not to go to Nascar, which is the same weekend.

I spoke too soon...

We now have the final verdict on our wedding plans. Kevin's Dad called me last night to tell me they don't want to have the reception at their house. He said they thought it would be best if we did everything elsewhere. Translation: they have lost control of the planning and no longer want anything to do with it. If it's not their way, it's no way. They did however, still offer to pay for the caterer or give us the money we've already spent. This means we are back to Back-Up Plan B, and that is for us to have the wedding at the church in the early afternoon, have a punch-and-cookies reception in Fellowship Hall afterward for everyone, and that night have our immediate family, the bridal party, and our out of town friends over to our house for "Barbeque and Booze". (I like my little code name for that. Heheh.)

I think this whole ordeal has been unbelievable. Kevin doubts his parents will even show up for the wedding, let alone the Barbeque and Booze. He even thinks his mother quite possibly would cancel the shower she is throwing for me, and either send out a letter to everyone she invited, or just not tell them and turn them away at the door in order to spite me. It's too bad they feel they have to behave this way, because everyone else has been great. They will look ridiculous if they don't show up to our wedding, but that's their decision. I refuse to let them run our lives. I know that if I caved in this one time, they would try and control every decision Kevin and I ever make throughout our entire marriage. Not gonna happen!!

My parents, on the other hand, don't gove a hoot what we do, as long as we're happy. My Dad is tickled that he gets to put on his shorts and sneakers and bring the half-barrel grill, since he'll be the honourary BBQ chef. And this way we'll get to spend time with the people we never see; the people who have supported us throughout this whole thing.

Changes in wedding location: 3
Changes in reception location: 3
Number of times invitations were printed: 2
Number of arguements with in-laws: too many to count
Doing things our way: PRICELESS!

wildflowers

Last night after work I went out and finally started my wildflower garden along the fence next to our driveway. Last year I planted several Purple Coneflowers and Black-Eyed Susans which have already started to poke out of the soil. So, yesterday I planned out the plot and got out my flower seeds and went at it. I planted Giant Sunflowers in the back to give us privacy from the neighbors who are nosy. I also planted Shasta Daisies, Cosmos, Gypsophilia (Baby's Breath), New England Aster, Columbine, Coreopsis, more Black-Eyed Susans, and Nasturtiums in the flower boxes on the fence. Since this was my first experience with starting flowers from seeds, let's all say a little prayer and hope they come up.

not so bad

Last night Kevin and I had a "discussion" with his Mom about our change of wedding plans. The conversation actually went smoothly, about which I was rather surprised. There was no yelling or screaming, which I had greatly anticipated. I calmly explained to Kevin's Mom how we would proceed with things, and though she had a lot of questions, I had all the answers. I was assertive and she was receptive. The only thing she did say was that she still needed to "run it by" Kevin's father, who is supposed to call us tonight. We'll see what happens.

talk about preoccupation

Below is a note I wrote to a co-worker yesterday regarding a piano lesson cancelation:
Donna,
Karen S. has to cancel her wedding this week but will be here next week.
Heidi

one can squish a lot of activity into only 2 and a half days

Here's the low down on our wild weekend:
Friday
Ok, so I usually do not like car trips, but I have to say that travelling with my husband was fun. 4 hours on the way to Rochester gave us a chance to catch up on things. We haven't spent very much time together since he started working nights. We arrived in Rochester about 11pm. I was exhausted, but Kevin was still hyper, so he went out to Mastrella's with my sister Gretchen and her friend Lauren to hear my brother Scott's band Freestile Walkin'. I am bummed I fell asleep, because Kevin said they were awesome. That's not because he was drunk and couldn't tell the difference.

Saturday
Got up early to go to my dress fitting. Julia's Mom is truly an artist. My dress looks so much like my grandmother's, I couldn't believe it. After the fitting, my Dad cooked us one of his famous brunches (eggs, bacon, toast, the works....mmmmm) and then insisted on driving us by the scene of this huge accident that took place near where my parents live. Read the article here. A gasoline tanker truck crashed, spilling thousands of gallons of gasoline and scorching the better part of an entire neighborhood.

Then it was on to meet with our minister. We snuck into the back of my old church to watch Merle officiate a wedding ceremony, and afterward Kevin and I were able to have a brief meeting with him about our own wedding. Even he said it would be bad professionally for me not to include my church choir at our wedding.

Sue and I headed to Park Place Deil for lunch, where I had what I consider to be the best egg salad in the entire city of Rochester. It was such a treat! Shortly after, Kevin and I left to come home.

Sunday
This by far was the best day of the weekend. After church, we packed up the car and the boat and headed down to the lake. Yes, it was a little chilly, but we were heavily bundled. Once we got on the river and the wind died down, so it wasn't too bad. The sun was out, we were with great company, we had on some great music, and the water was so relaxing with the sun shining on us. We cruised up and down the river for about 4 or 5 hours, till the sun started going down. For the first time in a few weeks, Kevin and I were stress-less, which is a fantastic feeling. It makes you realize how insignificant little things like stupid arguements are, and how in the grand scheme of things, really all that matters is your own happiness. So, in the words of Bob Marley, "Let's get together and feel all right."

one more thing

I have forgotten to mention my new addiction: Manor House. Reality TV hopefully has a new standard. Find out how much of a snob you are (I'm 70% snob) with the Snob Status Quiz. Heh heh. It's fun.

nothing yet

Tonight Kevin and I are off to Rochester for a brief visit and my dress fitting. It will do us good to get out of here, even if it will only be for 24 hours. The stress of the wedding planning is starting to get to both of us.

There still has not been a resolution to the in-law problem. Kevin had a "discussion" with them the other day, but nothing was decided, really. There was a lot of guilt-tripping and yelling. I didn't even get to say my piece. They told us we had to decide what we're doing by Monday. So I have a phone call to them planned for late Sunday afternoon/evening. I just hope they are willing to hear me out and I hope they are willing to compromise. If they are not willing, then I guess we are not willing either. All I can say, however, is that my parents are being so supportive and flexible. I'm very lucky.