Where does one draw the line between being honest and being tactful, and not feel guilty for doing so?

Someone once told me that you cannot force a person to feel guilty - that person creates his or her own feelings of guilt and chooses to feel them or not feel them. I don't know how much truth there is in that statement. I know I personally do not have that much control over my feelings. I feel what I feel, when I feel it, based on the surrounding circumstances. I suppose the only way, then, to control my feelings would be to also control the circumstances which affect them. Ha!

And now to get into a little he-said/she-said heresy: yesterday my husband told me that my mother-in-law told him that I said my friends thought I should leave him. Which of course did not happen, nor would it ever, I suspect. I suppose I should just leave this one alone, but where on earth does Mother-in-law get off making such presumptions? Grr! And do I confront her about it? I've learned that with her, all I can do is take what she says at mere face value.